Why is there so much subtle discrimination against effeminacy?

I grew up in a traditionally homophobic household. Traditionally I was heterosexual and I stay so until I was 25 years old. I recall how I would walk about with my chest sticking out to emanate a masculine ora about myself. I got into fights like the other boys and won mostly to my surprise. By the time I turned 25 I had made a reputation for myself around town and didn't have to worry about being teased or picked on. I used that opportunity to walk boldly in my effeminacy. I speak very softly as well as dress softly in clothes that flow and move when I move. I haven't had to worry about public opinion regarding my Feminine characteristics. I feel free to be me without care of what any one in society has to say. Though, I have 2 nephews that experience more homophobia at home that out in society. I believe that slowly society is coming into an acceptance of allowing people to be who they are rather than desiring them to conform to their own traditional beliefs. After all, tradition changes as time changes.